Defining a Healthy Relationship - Intimacy - Episode 6

This is the second episode of a two part series discussing important components of healthy relationships.  It discusses the concept of seeing yourself as an embodiment of love and how that perspective can guide you in your day-to-day interactions (exercise at 07:06).  It also reviews an exercise to help you develop a stable sense of yourself that is not tied to the roles that you play in your life.  

By clarifying our values and seeing ourselves clearly, we can develop a more clear sense of what we want from relationships.  From there, we can learn to clearly communicate our wants and needs and set boundaries appropriately.  Developing intimacy in relationships requires that we take a leap of faith into vulnerability.  I mention a compelling TED talk by Brene Brown called The Power of Vulnerability.

Finding deep intimacy in relationships sometimes means being able to walk away from relationships when we are no longer compatible to make room from greater connection in new relationships.  

Take Action:

For one day (or hour or interaction), live as though you are an embodiment of love.  Treat yourself and others from that perspective.  I also encourage you to let yourself be seen in your relationships. 

Please email me at with questions or feedback. 

The Love of the Guru: Reflections on a Ram Dass Retreat - Episode 3

Have you ever been curious about the concept of the guru?  I explore my initial reservations about the concept and revise my definition. 

This episode also discusses the question of whether we need teachers, therapists, or gurus to transform.  I share some of my personal experiences learning about and reflecting on Ram Dass’s guru, Neem Karoli Baba.  Let’s consider how experiencing unconditional love can help to purify us from our egos to more fully embody the love that we are. 

Please consider learning more about Ram Dass and his teachings by checking out or this list of selected books by Ram Dass and collaborators: 

•  Be Here Now or Remember, Be Here Now (1971) ISBN 0-517-54305-2

•  The Only Dance There Is (1974) ISBN 0-385-08413-7

•  Journey of Awakening: A Meditator's Guidebook (1978) ISBN 0-553-28572-6

•  Miracle of Love: Stories about Neem Karoli Baba (1978) ISBN 0-525-47611-3

•  How Can I Help? Stories and Reflections on Service (with Paul Gorman) (1985) ISBN 0-394-72947-1

•  Compassion in Action: Setting Out on the Path of Service (with Mirabai Bush) (1991) ISBN 0-517-57635-X

•  Still Here: Embracing Aging, Changing and Dying (2000) ISBN 1-57322-871-0

•  Be Love Now (with Rameshwar Das) (2010) ISBN 1-84604-291-7

•  Polishing the Mirror: How to Live from Your Spiritual Heart (with Rameshwar Das) (2013) ISBN 1-60407-967-3

Take Action:  Loving Awareness Meditation

Here is a link to an article  by Ram Dass about the meditation and to a YouTube video where he directs you through the process. 

Love is not something that you need to become.  It is something that you already are.  It’s not about thinking or even about doing, it is about being.  This meditation practice can help you learn to be the loving awareness that you are. 

Love Is The Answer Podcast Introduction - Episode 0

Out of everything that exists in the world, we have the most control over ourselves.  By focusing on what we can control, we can create more change.  Love Is The Answer covers topics related to developing greater self-compassion and compassion for others.  Compassion is a necessary component to sustaining motivation and improving our relationships.

The four basic premises of Love Is The Answer are reviewed.  They are:

1)   We are worthy.

2)   We are love.

3)   Illusion distorts our perceptions of ourselves, others, and the world.

4)   We are one.

I share my knowledge from the study and practice of psychology and my own personal experiences on a journey of self-transformation.  Wisdom from science and spirituality is integrated into each episode.